Identity Thief Kicks Off Pre-Valentine's Day Rom-Com Swarm

Single people and audiences with generally good taste cry foul as the official romantic comedy season begins in the week before Valentine's Day with Identity Thief. The film features Jason Bateman playing Jason Bateman in a crazy situation that doesn't at all go along with the no-nonsense attitude we've never seen before. Said situation is a woman (Melissa McCarthy) thousands of miles away who's been making insane purchases after stealing his identity. Before you can cue the song "How You Like Me Now" over a wacky montage, comedy ensues as Bateman hunts her down, and you can expect hilarious antics to occur as they finally meet and enter a hilarious duel of wits. Like getting kicked in the crotch. But what they don't expect.....is to fall in love. In standard rom-com fashion, the two realize they aren't so different and begin developing affections for one another in deep moments of honest dialogue in between the various scenes of people getting hit by cars, snake bites, and numerous references to McCarthy's genitalia. All to some of your favorite hits by the likes Elton John and Celine Dion. It's a film with a heart so strong, they had to give it an R rating. And the couples demographic is expected to eat it up as a reminder of the love-themed holiday approaching next week by seeing the likes of McCarthy attempt to romanticize a gangster by the name of Big Chuck, known for his large posterior. The film is expected to be a hit before A Good Day to Die Hard moves in on its territory. Though the Die Hard series has been placed on the Harry Met Sally-levels of Rom Coms, it's not known if audiences will return after a fatigue of recent romantic comedy films like Movie 43 and Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters. Also, to the chagrin of many, it will not be in 3D.

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Danny Devito Joins Already Obscure Cast of Villains as Doc Ock in Amazing Spiderman Sequel

(Danny in a released publicity shot for the character while filming)

The Amazing Spiderman 2 has started filming this week and is due to be released in the summer of 2014 (on the 10^th anniversary of the sequel no less! Take that, Sam Raimi! Even though your versions made more money and were more critically well-received! Ha!) The story will pretty much be Spiderman doing Spiderman stuff and learning more about his past. Or, if we learned anything from the first film, promising to learn about his past but in the end only just hinting at a bunch of stuff that can be used to draw people into future sequels. While the cast will more or less stay the same with Andrew Garfield's spot-on portrayal of Michael Cera portraying Peter Parker, this past week has revealed some big names for the future villains. The Amazing Spiderman offered us Rhys Ifans' haunting performance of a scientist who becomes corrupted after wearing a baggy lizard suit, but the world of Spiderman is moving on as Jamie Foxx has been confirmed to play Electro. A guy who does electric stuff. Or something. (Is he going to charge me $80 to look at my television and tell me I need a new one? They're the real supervillains!) But much like a Saturday afternoon infomercial, wait! There's more! Paul Giamatti has recently been confirmed to be on board the film as The Rhino. Yes that's right, Jamie Foxx and Paul Giamatti as the villains for the next Spiderman film. Both have contributed significantly to some of the smarter films of Hollywood with their spectacular performances as of late. With the likes of Sundance gem Win Win and newest piece of Tarantino genius Django Unchained, what better way for these two to progress their acting abilities than reading lines out while green spandex and a giant rhino costume? But who are we to dismiss this casting so early when Alfred Molina took a depart from more dramatic roles and did a spectacular job as Otto Octavian in Spiderman 2? (Again, thank goodness the Amazing Spiderman films exist to correct all the horrible horrible flaws in Sam Raimi's original films.)

But we now have reason to further our excitement for the film as Danny Devito has been confirmed as of today that he WILL be in the sequel as none other than the new Doc Ock himself!

“We were going to include a really extensive build up to the new Green Goblin with an intricate Oscorp sub-plot. But one day Danny Devito wandered in out of nowhere and started waving his arms about while babbling incoherently. Everyone loved it. It was then and there that I realized THIS is our Doc Ock.” released in a statement from director Mark Webb this morning.

“I just sorta showed up and now they got me playing a marine biologist or something.” Devito said this morning. “I haven't even read the script. Having worked on Always Sunny, ya just know that improv really works in major comedies like these. It's mostly just me running in and waving my metal tentacles around. Sometimes I don't even bother with the costume.”

“When Mark Webb asked me to rewrite the entire script to fit in Dr. Octopus, I knew I'd have to think fast to fit the shooting schedule and not destroy the story we've already developed for months. I think one scene I came up with has Peter getting a burger or something. He's about to take a bite when Doctor Octopus (Devito) just runs in laughing before stealing the burger with one of his tentacles. Peter just sorta shakes his fist at him and has one of those "well there's $3 down the drain" moments. I dunno, it shows he's there and that he's not a very nice guy. That's what counts. I guess.” Revealed Alex Kurtzman, one of the screenwriters.

“It makes about as much sense as me being in the film.” Paul Giamatti admitted when asked how he felt about this newest addition.

“It all boils down to two major points.” Mark Webb declared to all the fans skeptical of this radical change. “One, Otto is a universal Spiderman villain. There's a lot of depth to his character that I think Devito can really tap into and reveal the human side that leads him to his certain actions as a villain. Two, you're going to pay to see it no matter what we do. Technically we don't have to even try.”

Clearly, we could see that from the first film.

The Amazing Spiderman 2 will be released May 4, 2014.

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