Identity Thief Kicks Off Pre-Valentine's Day Rom-Com Swarm

Single people and audiences with generally good taste cry foul as the official romantic comedy season begins in the week before Valentine's Day with Identity Thief. The film features Jason Bateman playing Jason Bateman in a crazy situation that doesn't at all go along with the no-nonsense attitude we've never seen before. Said situation is a woman (Melissa McCarthy) thousands of miles away who's been making insane purchases after stealing his identity. Before you can cue the song "How You Like Me Now" over a wacky montage, comedy ensues as Bateman hunts her down, and you can expect hilarious antics to occur as they finally meet and enter a hilarious duel of wits. Like getting kicked in the crotch. But what they don't expect.....is to fall in love. In standard rom-com fashion, the two realize they aren't so different and begin developing affections for one another in deep moments of honest dialogue in between the various scenes of people getting hit by cars, snake bites, and numerous references to McCarthy's genitalia. All to some of your favorite hits by the likes Elton John and Celine Dion. It's a film with a heart so strong, they had to give it an R rating. And the couples demographic is expected to eat it up as a reminder of the love-themed holiday approaching next week by seeing the likes of McCarthy attempt to romanticize a gangster by the name of Big Chuck, known for his large posterior. The film is expected to be a hit before A Good Day to Die Hard moves in on its territory. Though the Die Hard series has been placed on the Harry Met Sally-levels of Rom Coms, it's not known if audiences will return after a fatigue of recent romantic comedy films like Movie 43 and Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters. Also, to the chagrin of many, it will not be in 3D.

Like us on Facebook!

Danny Devito Joins Already Obscure Cast of Villains as Doc Ock in Amazing Spiderman Sequel

(Danny in a released publicity shot for the character while filming)

The Amazing Spiderman 2 has started filming this week and is due to be released in the summer of 2014 (on the 10^th anniversary of the sequel no less! Take that, Sam Raimi! Even though your versions made more money and were more critically well-received! Ha!) The story will pretty much be Spiderman doing Spiderman stuff and learning more about his past. Or, if we learned anything from the first film, promising to learn about his past but in the end only just hinting at a bunch of stuff that can be used to draw people into future sequels. While the cast will more or less stay the same with Andrew Garfield's spot-on portrayal of Michael Cera portraying Peter Parker, this past week has revealed some big names for the future villains. The Amazing Spiderman offered us Rhys Ifans' haunting performance of a scientist who becomes corrupted after wearing a baggy lizard suit, but the world of Spiderman is moving on as Jamie Foxx has been confirmed to play Electro. A guy who does electric stuff. Or something. (Is he going to charge me $80 to look at my television and tell me I need a new one? They're the real supervillains!) But much like a Saturday afternoon infomercial, wait! There's more! Paul Giamatti has recently been confirmed to be on board the film as The Rhino. Yes that's right, Jamie Foxx and Paul Giamatti as the villains for the next Spiderman film. Both have contributed significantly to some of the smarter films of Hollywood with their spectacular performances as of late. With the likes of Sundance gem Win Win and newest piece of Tarantino genius Django Unchained, what better way for these two to progress their acting abilities than reading lines out while green spandex and a giant rhino costume? But who are we to dismiss this casting so early when Alfred Molina took a depart from more dramatic roles and did a spectacular job as Otto Octavian in Spiderman 2? (Again, thank goodness the Amazing Spiderman films exist to correct all the horrible horrible flaws in Sam Raimi's original films.)

But we now have reason to further our excitement for the film as Danny Devito has been confirmed as of today that he WILL be in the sequel as none other than the new Doc Ock himself!

“We were going to include a really extensive build up to the new Green Goblin with an intricate Oscorp sub-plot. But one day Danny Devito wandered in out of nowhere and started waving his arms about while babbling incoherently. Everyone loved it. It was then and there that I realized THIS is our Doc Ock.” released in a statement from director Mark Webb this morning.

“I just sorta showed up and now they got me playing a marine biologist or something.” Devito said this morning. “I haven't even read the script. Having worked on Always Sunny, ya just know that improv really works in major comedies like these. It's mostly just me running in and waving my metal tentacles around. Sometimes I don't even bother with the costume.”

“When Mark Webb asked me to rewrite the entire script to fit in Dr. Octopus, I knew I'd have to think fast to fit the shooting schedule and not destroy the story we've already developed for months. I think one scene I came up with has Peter getting a burger or something. He's about to take a bite when Doctor Octopus (Devito) just runs in laughing before stealing the burger with one of his tentacles. Peter just sorta shakes his fist at him and has one of those "well there's $3 down the drain" moments. I dunno, it shows he's there and that he's not a very nice guy. That's what counts. I guess.” Revealed Alex Kurtzman, one of the screenwriters.

“It makes about as much sense as me being in the film.” Paul Giamatti admitted when asked how he felt about this newest addition.

“It all boils down to two major points.” Mark Webb declared to all the fans skeptical of this radical change. “One, Otto is a universal Spiderman villain. There's a lot of depth to his character that I think Devito can really tap into and reveal the human side that leads him to his certain actions as a villain. Two, you're going to pay to see it no matter what we do. Technically we don't have to even try.”

Clearly, we could see that from the first film.

The Amazing Spiderman 2 will be released May 4, 2014.

Follow Culture Shocked Media on Facebook for all your movie info that can't be found anywhere else!

Like Us on Facebook!

Seth Macfarlane Planning No Less Than 13 Family Guy Voices for the Oscars.

Picture the scene. It's the night of the 83^rd annual Academy Awards as Christoph Waltz goes up on the stage to accept his Oscar for his work in Django Unchained. A moment that will forever live in the minds of those talented as a defining point in their career. By accepting this award, millions will know the full extent of this actor's abilities and all of their film trailers following this night will have the pleasure of being able to attach “With Academy Award winner...” for extra flair. Naturally of course, this star-studded night will appropriately be met with Seth Macfarlane jokingly pulling away the Oscar Award from the winning nominees before offering it back to them doing his high pitched Peter Griffin voice. Because in case you'd forgotten, Seth Macfarlane is hosting this awards show, and he's going to do his best to make sure everyone remembers all the shows he's put his name on. The Academy selected him as a result of their desire to appeal to the younger demographic. Because the people you want watching the biggest awards show celebrating film should be the same people who paid money to see Ted.

“As a lover of the world of film, this is an honor above anything I could ever imagine.” Seth beams while looking over his notes for which actresses will be receiving a “Giggity Giggity” in his Quagmire voice. “I'm thinking of using at least 13 Family Guy voices. I know I only do like 7 on the show in actuality, so I'm working on some new ones that I can introduce in the next season or something.” When questioned on whether he was worried his voices for Family Guy would interfere with the integrity, Seth was quick to dismiss this idea.

“Far from it. I know how much this means to a lot of people. This is a night dedicated to cinema, not Family Guy.” Seth acknowledged. “That's why I'm also planning on working in some stuff from American Dad, The Cleveland Show, and that Flintstones reboot that never got picked up. I want to remind people that I did all of those.”

When the Oscars gave Seth the go-ahead to make a skit featuring his foul-mouthed Teddy Bear, Ted, in a short skit with Mark Wahlberg (whose role in the film was shockingly not done with motion capture CGI like his furry companion) to be presented at the ceremony. This nod from the Academy gave Seth an unparalleled amount of bad ideas in which he can milk his other franchises for all they're worth.

“It won't all be jokes!” Seth quickly added. “At some point I'd like to use my Stewie voice to tell people to buy Family Guy on dvd or I'll destroy them. Or I can do it in Brian's and mix in some of my own liberal ideas to force onto other people. There's just a lot of possibilities.”

At this point we at Culture Shocked would like to remind anyone concerned over Seth's participation that the Academy Awards have always been pretty awful.

“Hey Lois! Remember the time The Artist won best picture? That was a friggin' joke.”

Even through his grating Peter Griffin voice, we can't help but agree with him there.

Man of Steel to Feature Major Tie-In With McDonald's

It's a huge day on the set of Man of Steel. Henry Cavill looks over his script in his dazzling Superman costume. Cameramen and lighting grips are in the process of setting everything up for the next scene that will shortly be filmed. But director Zack Snyder is looking around nervously as if something is out of place. As if on cue, a young stagehand rushes in carrying a bag brandished with a familiar yellow pair of golden arches. He pauses to catch his breath as Cavill takes the bag and pulls out a Chipotle BBQ Snack Wrap. Snyder heaves a sigh of relief and resumes his professionalism. He calls “ACTION!” and sets forth the wheels for what will be one of the most ambitious uses of product placement in Hollywood.

“This is something we've really been excited about.” says Charles Roven, one of the producers on the film, wearing a grin not unlike that of a child who's just been given the keys to the biggest toy store. “I think it all began not too long ago when I was watching Iron Man. I noticed a scene in which Tony Stark returns home from the Middle East and demands an American cheeseburger. Sure enough, in the very next scene you see a Burger King bag in his hand as he chows down on the familiar chain's cheeseburgers. Suddenly I found myself hungry for one and was already looking for my car keys!” At this point Roven laughs, as if finally being a part of a joke that's been circulating for years.”It turns out they were closed by the time I got there” he admits with a shrug “but the impact had still been left upon me. And you know what? There was a McDonald's right down the road and they're open 24 hours a day! So as I sat there in the parking lot eating my very affordable and satisfying McDouble, I thought “Hey, why can't we use this in Man of Steel but on a much larger scale?”

“I admit I was a bit skeptical towards the idea of implementing McDonald's into my film” Director Zack Snyder admits while dunking a McNugget into a packet of tangy barbecue sauce. “Then I thought it through a bit. People like Mcdonald's. And people like Superman. When you get down to it, they're actually a natural match.”

“I just like it 'cause I get to eat a lot.” Cavill testifies through a mouth full of french fries.

“But the story really is key, not the product.” Snyder emphasizes while waving the script for Man of Steel. “So once I realized how well McDonald's could actually fit into the origin story of Superman, I felt like we had the potential to add a whole new spin onto an already great story. Oh, and it'll be in 3D.”

Some of the changes in which Snyder refers to include a scene in which a young Clark Kent wakes up later than usual at 10:28 in the morning. We at Culture Shocked got to watch a visually stirring display as Clark races against the clock using his high speed flight ability to make it McDonald's before they remove their breakfast menu at 10:30. Hanz Zimmer's grand thematic music plays as Clark glances at his watch turning to 10:29, pushing himself to go as fast as he can.

“It's a great scene because it works on a lot of levels.” says Christopher Nolan, producer and head of story. “On one hand, it deals with the typical qualities of all origin stories in which we see the main character coming to grips with his powers in relation to their everyday tasks. On the other, it's a great way for audiences to learn about McDonald's amazing breakfast menu. Particularly the delicious Bacon, Egg, and Cheese McGriddle.”

Another scene that DC Entertainment was kind enough to show us was a heart-pounding moment during the climax in which Superman must fly away to square off against General Zod and save Metropolis. Unfortunately Clark had been staying up late the night before and just can't find the energy now to utilize his powers and save the day. It's a moment for the Oscars as Clark doubles over on the ground, exhausted and on the verge of tears at not being able to be the hero his father would have wanted. We at Culture Shocked were on the edges of our seats until Lois Lane runs in prominently brandishing a McCafe Frappe Mocha that McDonald's serves at any time of the day. Upon taking that first sip, Clark immediately finds the energy he needs, and wiping a bit of whipped cream off his upper lip, blasts off towards the climactic final battle; coffee in hand.

“It's a major moment for the film.” Snyder says to us from the side while the scene plays out. “I'm planning a lot of slow motion. More than usual.”

“And we've already got wheels in motion for a potential sequel” Nolan later told us. “We'd like to have Aquaman make an appearance. He could bring Clark a Filet 'O Fish. Or something”

But the film won't be the only one putting their all into getting their partner's name out there. McDonald's fully intends to return the favor this summer with a slew of new menu items based off of Man of Steel. Including a new Big Mac, the Big Mac of Steel; which will feature an extra patty and a red cape of ketchup covering the top bun. (Originally titled Buns of Steel until changed for obvious reasons.) For desserts, plans exist for a new vanilla shake smothered in strawberries at the top, a dessert to resemble Amy Adams' portrayal of Lois Lane. Unfortunately, major plans for Man of Steel Happy Meal toys fell through as it would've coincided with the ever-popular re-release of the My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic figurines.

“It's like directing with an all new take on what a film can truly be” Snyder tells us with a triumphant grin as we make our way out of the studio, each with a carton of Chicken McPoppers in hand. “It's like, if I'd known what it could do for the picture I would've done it in the past. Hell, I wish I could've done it with Watchmen. Think about it. A blueberry Dr. Manhatten milkshake. Damn. Talk about a missed opportunity.”

We also got a quick word with screenwriter Dave Goyer, who we asked if the film would feature any of the healthier items from the McDonald's menu as a response to the ongoing concerns about childhood obsesity.

He shook his head and told us “Nobody goes to McDonald's for that sh*t”



(Be sure to like Culture Shocked Media on Facebook!)